It’s the end of January. How is your dream to learn Chinese coming? Are you crashing or going strong? That probably depends on how much time you put into planning each step. The reality of a goal is always harder than it sounds on New Years Eve. The difference between crashing and success lies in finding a new normal for you. But a new normal means changing everything.
Why is following a dream hard?
Learning Mandarin Chinese or any other dream takes dedication. It changes and threatens everything else in your life. Your husband/wife/best friend might not understand why you go to Chinese class on Tuesday evenings or Saturday mornings. Jon Acuff gives his perspective about when this happens. When you follow your dream, they see their own failures.
Your husband/wife/friend may also be threatened by the change in you. How do the changes in you impact your relationship with them? People outgrow relationships all of the time. Now that’s scary. Then there is the fear you personally have of change. What if you succeed? Even worse, what if you succeed and nothing changes or no one cares?
So what now?
If your dream is causing relationship struggles, you need to talk to the other person. Find out why. Are they guilty for not coming along for the ride? Are they mad because they aren’t following their own dream? Does following your dream mean less time for them? You might find an easy solution, but you might need to work at it. Dreams are worth the effort. It may come down to making a choice between the friend and your dream. I hope not.
Bring Your Friends Along for the Ride
Try to get your old friends to take on a role in your new life. Maybe they can become an accountability coach. They check in and see if things are going well. They follow your run in their car. They test your Chinese vocabulary with flashcards. What’s their dream? You can also encourage them to follow their dream and become their accountability coach.
Find New Friends
This does not have to mean letting go of your old friends. Finding new friends will broaden your horizons and breath new life into your goal. They never knew the old you and won’t be as tempted to ask you to skip Chinese class and go out drinking instead. If your dream is running a marathon, join a running group. If your dream is learning Mandarin Chinese, then join a study group.
End of New Years Resolution Series
I hope you found the last month of posts helpful. It was fun writing them. I am going to follow up with a post checking in here and there. Please reach out if you need support with your dream to learn Chinese. We’d love to help!
Please Consider these Questions and Comment
- What is your dream? Is your dream learning Mandarin Chinese?
- How have you built support for your dream? Do you attend a Chinese class?
- Have you had to let go of old friends to live a new dream?
- Have you made new friends as a part of your dream?